Momentum

[morsla]

A bunch of drunken teenagers blundered through the gardens the other night, as I was stretching. They decided that they wanted to learn Tai Chi... luckily, attention spans are short on a warm night, and they wandered off before things got too awkward.

I would have started back at training in Richmond tonight, but I've realised that I'm not physically up to it at the moment - even the half hour I spent on Liu He yesterday was enough to make my legs shake for hours. This is now the longest break I've taken from training since I started uni ('98), and I really don't want to see that part of my life slip away into the "things I used to do" bit of my past.

I've decided to start a "new year" resolution a month early, and train for at least an hour a day. Meditating, stretching & stancework are the main things that I can do at home, as they don't take up much room - I also need to strengthen my ankles again, as too many years of almost-sprains (plus a few real sprains, and some help from a moving car) mean that my matchstick ankles can snap like kindling. No point waiting until Jan1 to start doing something...

To be perfectly honest, I'm not all that happy with myself at the moment - especially since I got sick. I'm far thinner than I want to be, and I lost a lot of weight while I spent those weeks in bed. I know most people complain about the opposite, but it's still something that worries me. I'm now firmly on the "scrawny" side of the line, and I never really recovered properly. Now I feel like eight years of my life are washing away down the drain.

I have to climb out of this rut. Once upon a time, it was always harder to stop than it was to keep going - I wonder where my momentum went.

Comments

[one-mirror.livejournal.com]

Eat more potatoes, and don't be so hard on yourself ;) You did only just finish those six or so years of Uni a month ago...it might feel like a rut, but you seem to me like you've still got your shit together. Recovery takes time.

*confucious speaks*
:D

[morsla.livejournal.com]

When confucious tells me to eat more potatoes, I guess I have to listen ;)

It's been a bit of a slide downhill for a couple of years, though - I stopped Wushu because of injuries, and I've been doing less and less ever since. Every now and again, I stop and think about it - it's the thinking that does it... really must find a way to stop...

It's a long running story about me and a bugbear called Glum. When I'm fit, I can kick its arse... but when I slip up, it sneaks up on me. We're pretty evenly matched, and I'm never quite sure who's coming out on top.

[one-mirror.livejournal.com]

Bugbears! *hides*

Yes, potatoes good, you must listen. Spinach too!

Good luck :)

[morsla.livejournal.com]

I eat more potatoes, and far more spinach, than most households in Australia :) But thankyou.

[bishi-wannabe.livejournal.com]

Need to gain weight, ey?

Well, Garden of Jade Roses is not far off - I promise to serve up waaaay too much snack food.

[morsla.livejournal.com]

I just have to stop riding my bike there, and I'm set. I can eat more than most people I know, but the tiniest bit of exercise and *voom* - it melts away, not even bothering to leave a note. Hence the current problems...

Hey - by the time it starts, I'll be living around the corner. Maybe this will work.

[harkon.livejournal.com]

Maybe you have to eat more bits off dead animals?

[morsla.livejournal.com]

Actually, I've been eating more meat over the past couple of months, in case that helped... it hasn't done much except remind me that I don't like the taste as much as I used to.

[kashiichan.livejournal.com]

It stole my momentum and ran off into the sunset.
I miss them sometimes. :)